I was sitting in a summer training session at at school on August 21st when my phone rang. It was the adoption agency. I ran out of the room to the playground. “Hi, this is Mia with AdoptHelp. I’m calling with good news. You’ve been selected by a birth mother in Florida who is giving birth to a baby girl in December.” So much to process in that loaded sentence. Someone picked our profile? A girl? But I always thought of myself as a boy mom. December? I’ll be a Mama before the end of the year?! This is the best early birthday present ever. Mia gave me a few more details, none of which I remember. I was just anxious to get Brent on the phone. We officially accepted the placement and scheduled a call with the birth Mom.
Let’s flashback to January 2018. After an informational meeting with AdoptHelp, Brent and I decided our philosophy aligned perfectly with the agency. On January 15, 2018 we officially joined the AdoptHelp family. This is something we’ve talked about since before we were married. It was hard to believe it was actually happening. We were sent a THICK packet of paperwork. Applications. Home Visits. Profiles. Family photos. SO MUCH PAPERWORK. With the stress of school, it felt like a second job. We could have been a bit more urgent about finishing everything, but didn’t finalize all the work until the end of May. Brent was a bit of a perfectionist with the profile 🙂 After submitting all of our paperwork we were told to expect a 9-12 month wait. It was up to a birth mother to select us. To celebrate being done with all the initial work we went on the most amazing trip to Namibia and lived a “yes” lifestyle. This translated to running too. Run Cross Country for the first time since high school? Why not? Chicago Marathon with the American Development Program? Yes! Day trip in Sacramento to watch Ellen crush the California International Marathon? Absolutely!
It was all well and good, but does not compare to the fun of being Jane’s mother. My whole world changed when Jane was born on December 30, 2018. Not having experienced pregnancy, I wondered if I’d feel like Jane’s mom. I wondered if she would bond with me. I worried that my mother instincts wouldn’t kick in. It didn’t feel real until I held her in my arms.
I feel so blessed to have been there for Jane’s birth and to be the first to hold her after she was born. It was an honor to hold Jane’s birth mother’s hand through labor. We’ve built a strong relationship with her, and I know we’re going to be a part of each other’s lives forever. I love Jane more and more every day. Nothing beats the feeling when she laughs and smiles at me. I absolutely am Jane’s Mama, and those mother instincts definitely kicked in. It’s Mama and Jane all day everyday until April 1st. Oh and side note, yes, I’m a proud Jane, but Jane was not named after my running group. Jane met the name requirements for both Brent and I. I wanted a timeless family name (my Grandma and I both have the middle name Jane) and Brent wanted a female scientist. I love that she is named after a scientist who worked in Africa 🙂 For these next few weeks I am soaking it all in and taking advantage of every moment. Oh, and it turns out I love being a girl Mama too 😉